OFFICIAL ENDORSEMENT: PNR and Subject:CINEMA officially endorses the “MuppetOscar” movement!
You know, there is so much worthless and crazy s**t in the Oscar race these days that something needs to be done to shake things up. With the departure of Brett Ratner as producer and Eddie Murphy as host, a movement has sprung up in the past 24 hours to draft The Muppets to host the 2012 Academy Awards.
You know what – WHY THE HELL NOT?
The blogosphere is filled this morning with horrified bloggers and columnist doing their best to dissuade this notion. “OMG! NOW STOP BEING SILLY!”, most of them are saying.
I’m a serious movie fan. I take our work here at PNR and on Subject:CINEMA very seriously. But most average film-goers are SICK TO DEATH of Oscars by the end of the year, almost two months before they are actually handed out, and a full month before the nominations are even announced.
Because of the endless parade of pompous, arrogant, know-it-all OscarWatchers who start declaring their “dead cert” nominees lists during the middle of the Toronto Film festival in September – a full SIX MONTHS before the damn things are handed out.
Sure, I read ’em all. Last year, I did a check of 10 different “know it all” prognosticators, who were ABSOLUTELY certain about their list of nominees. NONE of the ten got all of the nominees in the “big six” – best picture, actor and actress, supporting actor and actress, and director – correct, and almost all of them had less than a 50% accuracy rate.
Is it any wonder I – and most of my fellow average Joe movie critics and fans – have HAD IT by the time the actual ceremony rolls around?
Having the Muppets host the Oscars would send one loud signal to potential viewers in a way that has never been sent before – “you better watch, because this is going to be FUN, and you never know what could happen!”
In the favor of the critics of this idea, yes, it’s going to take a gargantuan effort on the part of the Henson organization to pull this off. Yes, there would have to be some alterations. But people who worry about the performers being seen, think about this: Kevin Clash has been making the rounds of the film festival circuit with Elmo for the past year. When Kevin speaks as Elmo…NO ONE notices him standing there anymore. They’re too enchanted by the little red monster to even CARE about the Muppeteer any more. And I think that is exactly WHY this lunatic idea WILL WORK. It didn’t stop “Avenue Q” from winning a Tony for Best Musical a few years back, and it won’t hamper the Muppets from being winning Oscar hosts either. It’s more camera logistics than staging.
So bring on Kermit The Frog in his custom tux. Bring on Miss Piggy in her gown and pearls.. Give Statler and Waldorf a box and seat them with Jimmy Kimmel to comment on the proceedings. Put Gonzo backstage with a microphone and let him interview the winners and presenters. Have Beaker read the Academy rules to the home audience. Have Dr Teeth and The Electric Mayhem playing with the orchestra. Let it ALL Hang out! And above all, make the Oscars ::gasp:: FUN AGAIN!
And I will bet you that the overnight ratings will show at least a 10% to 20% INCREASE over the last several years.
So, Academy Of Motion Picture Arts And Sciences and ABC – the ball is in YOUR COURT. Are you gonna take a risk that could breathe life back into the overlong, usually overboring ceremonies? Or are you gonna play it safe and wonder the following morning why the ratings were down AGAIN, and kick yourself for not listening to the FANS who make the movie industry what it is?
It’s up to you….
On The web – hook up with http://www.facebook.com/MuppetOscars